Last fall your devoted writer decided to study abroad in Spain. I already had what I thought was a competent level in Spanish, and it served me well the first three months there. My grammatical errors and misunderstandings didn't occur until my last month.

It's the middle of November, much colder in Madrid than it is in the desert, and many people started getting colds and stuffy noses. I'm sitting at the dinner table with my host mom and brother when she suddenly states, "Estas constipado, hijo." I was in the middle of chewing my food, but I stopped and my eyes bulged. I knew that I had fit into the family well, but to talk about her son's constipation at the dinner table? That might happen if it were only them, but definitely not with me around. They proceeded to have a conversation about it and I just silently sat by, eating, thinking that maybe the cultures were very different after all.

The next day, I tell my Spanish friend about the night before. It turns out that I had run into a false cognate, a word that has a very different meaning in English than it does in Spanish, though the spelling is similar. It turns out that "constipado" means to have a stuffy nose, or congestion. There was no bathroom talk after all.

Speaking of false cognates, if you want to talk about preservatives in your food in Spain, never use the word "preservativo" because that means condom. However, that would make a very interesting conversation. "Conservantes" is the correct term to use and it could prevent a funny situation should you ever decide to go to Spain.

Hasta la proxima vez!